As one who time and again, year after year, fails in my Lenten aspirations of self-denial, fasting and prayer, it is in a spirit of sincere humility that I offer my reflections during this holy season of Lent on the idea of Pilgrimage in Place. Perhaps this extraordinary time, in which we’re compelled for our own good and the good of others to stay home, is an opportunity to access inner resources that are more easily ignored during ordinary times.
My own journey in the last few weeks has involved encountering levels of existential anxiety and dread that I haven’t experienced in many years. What if Don or I become seriously ill? What would it be like to separate ourselves from each other, as we’ve been advised to do, at a time of extreme need or even in death? Isn’t the time of such suffering the very time one stands by in tender compassion as one’s beloved suffers and perhaps dies? What if my daughter-in-law, the only parent her children have, becomes sick and dies? What if I also die? What would become of them? Beyond my intimate circle my thoughts run to: what is the endgame here? We are staying apart not to contain the virus but to slow the curve of infections so that hospitals won’t be more overwhelmed with critically ill patients than they can handle. How long will it be necessary for us to undergo the regime of social distancing? Three months? Six months or more? Until a vaccine is available which may take a year or longer. What will the ultimate impact be of a pandemic killing perhaps millions and of a global economy halted? This is unprecedented in our time, so we don’t know. We are in uncharted waters.
In the face of such profound upheaval I have drawn on perspectives from our tradition that I hope may offer comfort and inspiration to you as they have to me and suggest practices that draw us into conscious participants in Christ’s crucifixion and resurrection.
We belong to God:
“If we live, we live to the Lord, and if we die, we die to the Lord; so then, whether we live or whether we die, we are the Lord’s.” Romans 14:8
We are one Body:
The Gospel texts ring loud and clear with the testimony that we are interconnected, one in Christ. The coronavirus pandemic makes that clear in terrifying and wonderful ways. In this age of the worldwide web there’s a growing awareness of how cyberspace can bring us together and paradoxically divide us as we each gravitate to our comfortable silos. From a Christian perspective however, we are connected inextricably, as living parts of a living whole, a whole that transcends our existence as human beings with all life on planet Earth and transcends even our life on this planet and in which we are united with Christ in life beyond death.
Poem
“Each Moment a White Bull Steps Shining into the World” by Jane Hirshfield
If the gods bring to you
a strange and frightening creature,
accept the gift
as if it were one you had chosen.
Say the accustomed prayers,
oil the hooves well,
caress the small ears with praise.
Have the new halter of woven silver embedded with jewels.
Spare no expense, pay what it asked,
when a gift arrives from the sea.
Treat it as you yourself
would be treated,
brought speechless and naked
into the court of a king.
And when the request finally comes,
do not enter the pasture without pause,
without yourself trembling.
That you came to love it, that was the gift.
Let the envious gods take back what they can.
Practices
Centering Prayer:
I can think of no better time to explore the practice of contemplative prayer than when you’re confined to your quarters for an indefinite period of time. Centering prayer is a form of meditative practice that is distinguished by an attitude of surrender and openness to God. Unlike approaches to meditation that employ attention and concentration, in centering prayer the practitioner seeks to empty herself in the presence of God.
Resource: Centering Prayer and Inner Awakening, Cynthia Bourgeault
I continue to believe that the only authentic “worldwide web” exists in the Imaginal realm: i.e., in that subtler and quantumly more powerful bandwidth of energetic communion which links not only all beings of this planet, but also beings in all realms, including those on the other side of the life/death “divide.” It is from here that we receive our help—and it is here, too, that we give it! it is where our real human contribution to calming the inflamed heart of our planet can be most efficaciously offered.
Blog post, Cynthia Bourgeault, Contemplative.org, March 24, 2020
Conscious Work:
Our work, whether of extreme sacrifice happening daily now in hospitals among health professionals or in businesses designated as essential such as grocery stores, pharmacies, farms etc. or ordinary work done from our homes or in our homes as homeschooling, housekeeping, cooking etc. may become a spiritual practice if we undertake it as an intentional offering.
Conscious Suffering:
Suffering that comes our way unbidden becomes a spiritual practice when undertaken intentionally as an offering after the pattern of Jesus’ self-emptying on the Cross
Prayer
Prayer in a Time of Anxiety
It seems that I return to you most easily when I need comfort, O God.
Hello… here I am again, knowing that you are waiting for me with love and warming light.
In the shadow of your wings I find respite and relief that feeds my innermost self and renews my soul. Day and night, you are my refuge.
These uncertain days of news conferences and quarantines tempt me to assume the worst for my loved ones, myself and my community. “Pandemic” is a frightening word, and I can easily feel confused or helpless to respond. Now I am relying on you to lead and guide me, to put my anxiety in its place. Help me see it as a human response that keeps me conscious of the seriousness of this moment, but do not let it overwhelm my spirit. Buoyed by your love, I choose each day to let peace reign in me. Breathing deeply of your calm, I repeat, again and again, “You are here.”
Good and gracious Companion, my family and friends need tranquility and assurance. Help me to offer them your tenderness. Those in my community who are suffering need care. Help me to be generous and to keep contact with the forgotten. Our world calls for cooperation among national leaders, scientists, health care providers, and all who are instrumental in overcoming this crisis. May my prayers and support be with them all.
I have come back to you, and I will return, knowing that your open arms will never fail. God of hope may your love blanket the earth, as you teach us to live more generously today than yesterday. May my anxiety be transformed into love.
- Author requested to remain anonymous